Thursday, August 6, 2009


Judd? Why have you never drank alcohol?

I wouldn't bother telling you in person...

So here goes nothing:

Growing up I have very fond memories of my Mum.

Thousands of them.

I have next to nothing when it comes to memories of my Dad.

The only memories of him are him up 'his' end of the house, on his couch with a 6 pack of VB next to him.

Him coming home from the pub every night late drunk and angry.

I think the nicest thing i can remember him doing was buying me a KitKat while I entertained myself at the Kinross Pub all day while my mum slept, as she does night duty.

We as a family lived in constant fear of him. Im not going to elaborate further of the things he did to cause this fear.

But 'I' just took him as a joke as a kid, which is the best thing i could've done.

It meant i considered him in no way a family member,

and this 'smartass hatred' I had towards him helped disconnect any attatchment i had towards him.

So when the divorce finally took place when I was 10 or so...

it did not at all affect me negatively.

I remember we actually had a party.

It was one of the best things that could of happened i thought.

Although i did not care at all, that I had such a bad Father, I guess it has played a big role in my original opinions of Alcohol.

I think the thing that hurts the most, is when I get told stories of him and see photo's of him previous of him becoming wrecked by alcohol.

He was this young, rad/good-looking guy... photo's of him and my mum oversea's and stuff.

Some of the things he used to do and say were honestly hilarious.

Not that I ever met him.

Its this extreme contrast i see in him. That shows how negatively alcohol corrupts the brain and the body.

He now looks like an escaped convict, withering away... alone.

I remember whenever I was a shithead to my mum growing up, or even now...

She used to say "You're turning out to be just like him!"

This scared me. Terrified me really.

I thank her for this though! Don't worry.

It was at these young years of my life I had already sworn off ever drinking alcohol.

And comments like that made that vow to myself stronger and stronger.

Every member in my dads family seemed to turn out the same, and i compared that with my mum's family whom i loved greatly.

I want to be the greatness in my Dad, not the Worst.

One day I want him to realise what life he could of lived when he looks at me.

Rather than just calling me a faggot or a poofter, like he did throughout my childhood.


So there's my background.

Now to continue further into this.

When it finally came into that age of high school when

the big fuss and craze is over drinking I remember I first dealt with

telling people NO, i dont want to drink.

For some reason it was extremely hard for people to accept.

Even my closest friends would still nag me 4 years into it.

They've given up now haha which is good... and probably due to the increase of interest involving STRAIGHT EDGE.

When i saw people drinking, i just looked at it and would see them drinking poison.

Thats all they were doing... Poisoning their brains. Paralyzing themselves. They not likely to drink something labelled POISON but for some reason alcohol just get the big tick of 'acceptable'.

But back to the period of "underage drinking"

as much as it revolted me, i would get tempted...

especially when I wasn't feeling confident or shy, and

all my drinking friends would be oh so confident.

But i stuck at my guns. Im glad i did.

So now recently i've come to realise.

People who drink at a young ages either seem to mature much earlier, or just wind up failures of life.

So at this point in in time.

I'm becoming friends with the people who I would have probably despised when i was 13. The people who used to get smashed at 13.

But the thing i've come to realise...

They experienced that at immature stages of they're life.

and now they're all hitting the age of 18 (the age where now its meant to be appropriate) they're over it. They've done that and experienced it and now they would prefer to live with a life without it. Edge.

Which I really enjoy.

It says something about "clubbing" and that stupid cliche question you get asked when you tell someone you're 18...

"ooh have you gone out yet!?"

Don't even get me started on how much despise i have for the "NIGHT CLUB" scene... nothing but a good oppurtunity for ignorant girls to get raped by sleazy men.

Its overated.

I seriously have more fun at any party, without alcohol consumption, than people who do drink.

I feel good the next morning.

I dont regret anything, i dont spend my night crying or throwing my guts up. It's great.

So my tip for you is.

If Alcohol has become a nessecity in your life.

If you cant go to a party and not have fun without it then... you need to find some people who get you high on life. People you feel comfortable and confident around.

I remember during year 8 we had these two extreme, macho, strong freaks come to our school and do a performance of stuff like blowing up waterbottles with the strength of there lungs... and one of them later gave a bit of an inspirational speech about how he had never let alcohol pass his lips. It really inspired me, as before that i had never heard of anyone who had gone through life without a drop of alcohol. So this helped me keep my mind focused on who "I" was, and what i stood for throughout the tempted years of my life.

So just ask yourself...

has alcohol become a part of how you're shaped?

If it has, then make this impact a positive experience of change, not that you have to not ever drink again. but just make sure it doesnt shape to consume you. A learning experience.

Because I have seen it. Severly.

And i can see it... people that are shaping up in that direction.

So... THAT is why when people ask me "why don't you drink?" i usually give a false reason like "i just dont".

I hope that helps clear it all up for everyone.

And no i don't claim edge...

partially because i feel a bit more 'superior' :S

but its just a different story.

I respect straight edge people SO much though.

So yeh. this is me.




I want my first tattoo to have the text unpoisoned, what do you think?

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